A man inserted an advertisement in the classifieds “Wife Wanted”.
The next day, he received hundreds of replies,
all reading: “You can have mine.”

Ek Baat Hamesha Yaad Rakhna.
Duniya Mein Kuch Mile Na Mile.
Do Cheezein Haq Se Leni Chahiye.
Ek Samose Ke Sath Extra Chatni
Aur
Dusra Gol-Gappe Khane Ke Baad
Uska Pani .

filmon se ladkon ko kya
sikhna chahiye ??
Jannat
Murder
Gangster
Awarapan
Fanna
Titanic
.
Jo jitni mast ladki k chakar
mein pada utni hi buri mout
mara..

Wife:What Will You Give Me If I Successfully Climb & Reach The Top Of The Great Mt.Everest..
Husband:A Gentle Push..

Can a GIRL make u a MILLIONARE?
Yes !
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Conditions Apply:
U must be a BILLIONARE !

17century mom 2 her son
beta apne religion k ladkise shadikrna
18cntry-apne caste k
19cntry-apne level k
20cntry-apne desh
21cntry-koi bi par ladki se karna

Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.

A Psychology Report..
When 2 Couples come face to face..??
Wives look at each other's SARIS
&
Husbands Look at each other's WIFE..

GOD: I can't b evrywhere so I created MOTHER.
DEVIL: I too can't b evrywhere soI created GIRLS.
GOD: Dont worry I hav created BOYS to change them to MOTHERS!

Teacher: where is everest?
Student: I don kno..
Teacher: U Stand on the desk!
Student: stil cannot see ma'am

Doctor: U Look Exactly LIke My Third Wife.
Lady: How Many Wives Do You Have?
Doc : Two..

Santa road pe sandas kar raha tha.
Police ne use pakad liya.
Jab use le jaane lage to santa bola :
"sahab saboot to utha lo"!

One day,
I Kicked lion's face

I puld tigers tail

I broke cheetas leg

I threw elphants

then TOY SHOP OWNER kickd me out..!

Sir:Tense kitne tayp k hote hai?
Boy: 3 , present, past, future
Sir: gud
Exampl do
Boy:kal apki beti ko dekha tha,
Aaj pyar karta hu,
kal bhaga k le jaunga.

Touch it gently, put 2 fingers
inside, if it’s wide use 3 fingers,
make sure it’s wet and rub up
and down. Yep that’s how you
wash a cup.

Drinkers Movies Banate Toh-
1)Soda Akbar
2)Rab Ne Pila Di Thodi
3)Rum De Basanti
4)Hum Tight Ho Chuke Sanam
5)Beer Zaara
6)Bewde Zameen Par.

Husband: Judge Sahab Mujhe DIVORCE Chahiye,
Meri Biwi Ne 1 Saal Se mujh Se Baat Nahi Ki,
Judge: Phir Soch Lo,
Aisi Biwi Qismat Walon Ko Milti Hai.

Girl:Aaj Mere Papa Ne Mujhe
Tumhare Sath Bike Pe Jaate Hue Dekha..
Bf: Phir ?
Girl:Phir Kya,
Mujhse Bus Ke Paise Wapas Le Liye..!!

Husband : Tumse Shaadi Karke Mujhe Ek Bahut Faayada Hua.
Wife :kaun Sa Faayada?
Husband : Mujhe Mere Gunaaho ki Saza Jeete-Jee Hi Mil Gai

Yahoooooo…….!
Exams ki saari taiyaari ho gayi
Pen
Pencil
Scale
Eraser
Sab Taiyyar hai
BUS AB..
Padhna baki hai …:

AGAR APKO LAGTA HAI KI AP BEAUTIFUL HAI
SMART HAI
CHARMING HAI TO
KUTTA PALIYE…
SAAP PALIYE..
SHER PALIYE
MAGAR
GALAT FEHMI MAT PALIYE.

Pati: What’s hypnotism?
Patni: Kisi ko apne vash mein
kar K us se man chaha kaam
karwana.
Pati: Arey nahi isey to Shaadi
kehte hein

Sardar: In my dreams Rats play Football every night !
Doctor: Take this tablet you will be ok….
Sardar: Can I take tommorrow, tonight is Final Match

Santa ko puri raat Macharo ne bahut preshan kiya…
Santa ne Zehar Piya or Bola.
“Ab kaato Saalo Sab k sab Mar jaao ge”

Shayari by Sardar-
“Ek ladki ko dekha to aisa laga,
dusri ladki ko dekha to vaisa laga,
par dono ne thappad mara to ek jaisa laga

Boy: Challte Chalte Yunhi Ruk Jata Hoon Main
Bethe Bethe Yunhi Kho Jata Hoon Main
Kya Ye Hi Pyaar Hy . . .???
Girl: Nahi Ye Kamzori Hy
Subha Shaam Glucose Piya Karo . . .

Nurse: Aapke judwa bete hue hai
Sardar: ye toh hona hi tha program hi aise dekhti thi KBC -2 Indian Idol -2 Nach Baliye -2 Great Indian Laughter Challenge -2

Teacher: OXYGEN is must 4 Breathing… It was discovered in 1773
SARDAR: THANK GOD I WAS BORN AFT THAT.
Sardar: Thank God i was born after that! Pehlay Paida hota to mar jaata

Usne utari saree, fir aayi peticoat ki bari, blouse to pahle hi diya tha utar
ziyadah excited mat ho yaar, yeh tha kapray sukhane ka taar ….!

Aik rikshaw ke peche likha tha k
"SAWAN KA INTAZAR HAI"
Peche se aik truck aya or rikshaw ko oraa dia(hit kia) or us ke peche likha tha "AYA SAWAN JHOOM KE".

Which is the most confussing day in America(U.S.A)?
.
Fathers day..!!
coz..
NOBODY knows whom to wish….

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