A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman.
Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
Moral : BE SPECIFIC

Three FASTEST means of Communication :
1. Tele-Phone
2. Tele-Vision
3. Tell to Woman
Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE.

Possible Reasons When A Man Opens a car door for wife
1) The Car Is New.
2) The Wife Is New
3) (Most Imp) She Is Not His Wife

Wife 2 Husband: Did u Have any GF before marriage ?
Husband remains silent ?
Wife: what is D meaning of silence?
Husband: Wait.. let me count...

Wife: Our new neighbour always kisses his wife when he goesto work, why don't you do that? Husband: How can I? I don't even know her.

True bravery is 2 arrive home.....fully drunk......a latenight out.....& wife waiting with a jhadu and u ask: Hey abhitak safai kar rahi ho?

A white couple gets a black child.
Angry husband asks- You white, Me white. Why is baby black?
Wife- You hot, Me hot. Baby burnt!

It is said that Husband is the head of D family,
But
Remember that wife is D Neck of D family.
& the Neck can turn the Head exactly D way she wants.

pati patni bade hi khusi se reh rhe the...unki 25 aniversry thi
news reporter unk ghar gaye woh bahut famus couple the
reporter-ap k bech kabhi ladai nhi hoti?
pati-hm honeymoon pe gaye the.. mai aur meri patni horse pe baith k ghum rahe the...
bivi k horse ne use gira diya to meri bivi ne bola- pehli bar,aur woh phir use horse pe chad gye
horse ne phir giraya to boli- dusari bar,aur phir chad gye
horse ne phir giraya-kuch nhi boli,gun nikala aur horse ko mar diya
maine bola yeh tmne kya kiya,kyu mar diya,to ushne bola pehli bar
tab se hm santi se reh rahe hai

ek admi ne waiter ko 100rs tip diye
waiter-ap k liye mai roj shaam ko kone wali table reserve rakhunga
admi-maine tmhe ishliye tip di hai jab bhi mai apni patni k satha au to tm kehna table khali nhi hai,to mai use kisi saste se hotel mai le jaunga

pati patni ek bhed bahre bus mai ja rahe the
pati ek ladki pass jakar saat k khada ho gaya,yeh dekh kr patni ko jalan hue..
achanak ush ladi ne ek chata mara,aur kaha lo maja ek ladki to chikoti katne ki'
pati ne patni ko safaye dete hue kaha maine chikoti nhi kati..
patni muskura k bolo -mujhe pata hai,kyuki maine kiya tha yeh sab....

techr ne chote bache se pucha"bhagwan kaha hai"?
ek bache ne bola mujhe pata hai..
techr-batao
bacha-bathroom mai.
techr-ek pal k liye chup thi....phir boli tmhe kaise pata?
bacha-roj subah jab papa uthte hai.bathroom ka darwaja knock krte hue kehte hai ."Hey Bhagwan!tm ab tak andar hi ho...

ek pati apni patni ko yeh keh kr chidata tha- 3 bacho ki amma
patni ko bahut gussa ata tha
ek din jaise hi pati ne bola 3 bacho ki amma
patni ne turant jwab diya bolo- 2 bacho k papa..

ek kuwe ki manyata thi ki sikka dal kr mano kamna puri ho jati thi..
ek pati patni waha gaye
pati ne sikka dala aur kuwe k pass se haat gaya..
patni gaye aur woh kuwe pass juki sikka dalne k liye aur gir gaye ..
pati thodi der sant tha aur bhi bola-- itni jaldi ye to chamatkar hai.....

ek admi ko cncer hua tha
ek din ushk beta ne pucha-papa apko cancer hai phir bhi ap logo se keh rahe hai ki apko Aids hai..
pita ne jwab diya-taki mere marne k baad koi tmhari mummy ko chune ki himmat na kare...

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