santa aur banta speed mai scooter se ja rahe the..
traffic police- tm scooter itni speed mai kyu chala rahe ho,agr tmhara accident ho jaye to?
santa- tm hmare fikr maat karo bhagwan hmare sath hai..
traffic police- phir to tripling la chalan katna padega..

banta- kya biwi se ladai khatam ho gayi?
santa- haan wo ghutne tek kr mere pass aye thi.
bata- ushne ghutne tek kr kya kaha?
santa- yahi ki bed k niche se nikal aao, kuch nhi kahungi..

santa- mujhe tm bahut pasand ho.
ladki- meri chappal ka size pata hai na?
santa- lo kr lo baat dosti abhi hue nhi, farmayeshe suru..

:: New Jokes on Santa banta ::

banta- tm ladki dekh aye?
santa- haan raang mai kali hai, kaan se kaam sunti hai.
banta- jara english mai kaho?
santa- English me bole to blackberry..

santa- yaar aaj tak mera itna apman nhi hua.meri naye padosan ne mujhe nahate hue dekh liye..
banta- to tm kya chahte ho?
santa- badla..

santa- doctor 2 saal pehle mujhe bukhar tha..
banta- to ab kya hua?
santa- yaha se gujar raha tha to socha puch lu apne nahane ko mana kiya tha ab naha lu?

santa ne facebook pr apna a/c banay aur apni wall pr likha- yaha susu krna mana hai..

banta- ap yaha baithe ho apka dost maar gaya hai,ap gaye kyu nhi?
santa- mai jata magar ushne mujhe bulaya hi nhi...

santa- tmhari bhaish ne mere sare khet ujad diya hai..
banta- pr mere pas to koi bhaish nhi hai..
santa- mere pass kaunsa koi khet hai?

banta- sent msg kya hota hai?
santa- kr di na bewkufo wali baat,sent msg ka matlab khusbu wala msg yaar..

santa- chal race lagate hai, jo harega wo 1000rs dega..
banta- thik hai, pr mujhe rasta nhi pata..
santa- bas tm mere piche- piche rahna.
banta- dhanywad..

santa- kaal papa kuwe mai gir gaye bahut chot lagi bahut chilla rahe the..
banta- ab wo kaise hai?
santa- thik hi honge kaal se kuwe se koi awaj nhi aaye..

santa- kaal koi meri patni k purse se 2000rs nikal kr le gaya..
banta- wo jhuth bol rahi hai purse 1500rs hi the..
santa- paise ka masla nhi hai bas tm ush aadmi ka pata kr do..

banta- mai apna dimag bilkul change kr liya hai..
santa- apne bahut acha kiya, kyuki apka pehla dimag ghatiya tha...

santa- window sw jaldi kudo,police aa rahi hai.. banta- lakin ye 13th floor hai. santa- ye sagun afsagun sochne ka tym nhi hai,jaldi kudo...

banta- durdarsan wale bore program kyu dekhate hai? santa- kyuki wo bacho ki sehat ka khayal rakhte hai. bore program bache dekhte nhi ishliye jaldi so jate hai...

santa- radio kabhi newspaper ki jagah nhi le sakta.. banta- kyu? santa- kyuki radio se kabhi aag nhi jalaye ja sakti....

santa- kya tm mujhe 100rs udhar de sakte ho? banta- nhi mai kisi ko udhar nhi deta.. santa- to nagad hi de do...

santa- hm pati-patni tamil sekhna chahte hai.. banta- woh kyu? santa- hmne ek tamil bacha goud liya hai. hm sochte hai jab wo bolne lage ushse pehle hm tamil sekh le,,

santa- ap to hindi mai kafi tej hai, mujhe ye bataeye dwand kya hota hai? banta- dwand aise jode ko kehte hai jishme hamesha virodh rehta hai, jaise- sukh -dukh, sardi-garmi. santa- pati-patni...

santa- apki patni kyu bhag gayi?
banta- pata nhi! mai bathroom mai nahane gaya aur wo bhag gayi..
santa- lagta hai aisa mauke k liye bechri salo intzar krti rahi.....

banta- pehle to ap logo ko bahut haste the lakin ab kya ho gaya?
santa- meri shadi ho gayi....



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