Santa in Lift..
Girl : mehnga perfume laga k lift me ayi,
SANTA ko akad k boli Cobra perfume, Rs.6000..
2nd girl ayi : Jasmeen perfume"Rs.7000 ..
achanak lift ruk gayi or khuch smell aayi
dono ladkiyon ne apna naak pakda
ko dekhne Lagi..
SANTA with smile:- "Muli"14 Rupey Kilo..... Santa Madhosh \m/ ladkia Behosh

Teacher: Gaali kya hai?
Student: Krodh ke smay mukh se nikle ashudh shabdon ka samuh
Jinke uchcharan ke paschat Vyakti ke hriday Ko ShantiKa anubhv hota hai.

Ek bar santa church gaya....
Achanak light chali gayi aur andhera ho gaya...
Tabhi church ka ghanta baja"TONNN".
Santa chillaya- Ohh Teri UNDERTAKER aa gaya

Which is the most beautiful feeling in this world?
when you are trying to look at your friend; and you find that your friend is already looking at you.
Location: Examination Hall

American Lifestyle:
Daughter: Sorry Dad, I got married yesterday. Forgot to invite you.
Dad: You naughty girl! It's OK but don't forget me next time!

Preeto: Do you have a good memory for faces?
Banta: Yes but why?
Preeto: I just broke your shaving mirror.

Santa: I believe trust is the very key in a relationship.
Banta: I have to really agree with you on it. But what's your experience on it?
Santa: You see, if you don't trust your girlfriend, how could you be sure that she won't tell your wife?

Santa: Did you hear about the guy who finally figured out women?
Banta: I would sure love to know more about it.
Santa: He died laughing before he could tell anybody.

Women have an unfair advantage over Men. If they can't get what they want by being Smart, they can get it by being Dumb.

Pappu: Please give 500 rupees.
Jeeto: Money doesn't grow on trees.
Pappu: I am fully aware of it. That's why I'm asking you for it.

Banta: I am struggling to find a good birthday present for my wife.
Please suggest something that would simply surprise her!
Santa: How about a divorce?

A girl before marriage looks like a Barbie Doll.
After Marriage: Beautiful Doll;
After 1 Year: Nice Doll;
After 2 Years: Only Doll;
After 5 Years: Dholl;
After 10 Years: Dolly Bindra

Breaking news:
Two girls in Pakistan arrested for liking status of Ajmal Kasab's hanging.

Santa ne ek khubsurat ladki
ko pucha aap kaha rahti ho ?
Ladki: m.g.road
banta: itni khubsurat hokar bhi road par
rahti ho mere ghar chalo na...

Wen U convert Rs.50 lakhs into Rs.300 crores, U R called Vadra.
Wen U do D opposite, U R called Mallya. D difference is in choosing D right woman! //( very funny Politics jokes)

Man outside phone booth :
Excuse me !!
You are holding the phone since 20 mins.
haven't spoken a word..
Man inside - Sir
I'm talking to my wife
Topic over.

Wife to drunk husband: From now on,
if ur lips touch liquor
u will never touch my lips
Husband: awwww??
Wife: Now What r u thinking??
Husband: deciding,
18yr old Scotch
42yr old lips?

Papa- Beta Kabhi Na Karna Shaadi
Yeh Hai Jeevan Ki Barbadi
Beta Bola-
Papa Mai Bhi Farz Nibhaunga
Apne Bachcho Ko Bhi Yehi Samjhaunga.

Aaj Mene
2 Kasme Khai He..
1) Parai Ladki Pe Nazar Nahi
2) Kisi B Ladki Ko
Paraai Nhi Manunga.

SANTA, your son is Dead..

Hearing this bad news Santa jumps from 50th floor

35 flr:

He realizes- i don't have son
20 flr-

I am not married &
3rd flr-

SHIT I am Banta